Happy Birthday to my husband Nick. He turned 29 today! The old man...

I hate to admit it, but sometimes I find myself wondering, "What would my life be like if..."

~I had been born straight
~I had been born white
~My parents weren't Jewish, or holocaust survivors

Don't get me wrong, I love Nick, my religion and my race. But sometimes I wonder about it all. What my life would have been like if I had grown up not being afraid to introduce people to my parents. My father, STILL, after all these years has mental and emotional breakdowns. And I am SO grateful to have a husband who understands that my father is prone to that. But what if it wasn't like that? My parents were normal christian americans and not Polish Jews who had to immigrate here to finally escape. My life, which I was traumatized in high school by the way I was treated, would possibly be better? I mean, if I were straight, I wouldn't have to deal with the prejudices that go along with being gay. I would be settled down with a wife and we'd have children and it would be picturesque. Sure, Nick and I can have children. But they wouldn't be OURS. It wouldn't be something that we had both created and brought into this world. I don't know. I wonder sometimes though.

1. Have you ever gone muddin'?
Yea. Turned a nice white truck brown!

2. Have you ever lived on a dirt/gravel road?
I grew up on one.

3. Ever been swimming in a lake or river?
We had a river in the woods behind our house in Poland.

4. Ever been to a bonfire party?
No.

5. Have you ever driven a tractor?
Well, I was in my dad's lap. And I was five. Does that count?

6. Have you ever been on a horse?
Yes. We had about 10 of them on the farm.

7. Ford or Chevy?
Mazda

8. Kissed someone in a pick up?
Yea.

9. Whats your favorite country song?
Uh, something about being lonely and crying by Hank Williams.

10. Ever done 90 miles per hour down a dirt road?
No. I would have been screaming and crying.

11. Worked / Lived on a farm?
Both.

12. Been to a rodeo?
No. I can't stand that stuff.

13. Do you own cowboy boots?
Um, no.

14. Do you have a cowboy hat?
Bigger no.

15. Have you ever said git r done?
Once, just to amuse some friends. They wanted to know what it would sound like with an accent. And it's horrible.

16. Country skyline or a city skyline?
Country.

17. Can you name a rodeo star?
Garth Brooks?

18. Do you think tractors are sexy?
No, they smell bad.

19. Ever rode a 4-wheeler?
The back of one. yea.

20. Are you from the country?
Yea. Opinogora and now Franklin.

21. If so, are you proud of it?
Very.

22. Gone hunting?
Bleck.

23. Gone fishing?
Yes, but never again.

24. Is your heart in dixie?
What the crap is a dixie?

25. Been on a hay ride?
A haunted one, too!

26. Have you ever line danced?
Yea. Achy Breaky Ass!

27. Camped under the stars?
= pure hell

28. Have you ever been cow tippin?
How do you TIP a COW?

29. Do you drive a pick up truck?
When me and Nick switch cars, yea.

30. Fell asleep in a hay stack?
On accident, yes.

31. Own a pair of overalls?
No.

32. Drank Moonshine?
Moonshine?

33. Include the word "yonder" in your daily vocabulary?
Oh GOD no.

34. Ever shoveled manure?
Hehe. Yea.

35. Ever milked a cow?
Not sucessfully.

36. Plucked a chicken?
Ei! No!

37. Is sweet tea your favorite drink?
I like it, but not my favorite.

38. Been to a race?
Yes. And NO we don't support Jeff Jordon.

39. Know all the words to at least one David Allen Coe?
David Allen Who?

40. Have you ever made out in a back of a pick-up?
Hehe! YEA!

1. Ever punch someone in the face?

2. How old are you?

3. Are you single or taken?

4. Eat with your hands or utensils?

5. Do you dream at night?

6. Ever seen a corpse?

7. Have you ever wished someone dead?

8. Do You Like Bush, the president?

HERE COMES THE FUN ... ... ...

9. Whats your philosophy on life? and death?

10. If you could do anything with me, and have no one know..

11. Do you trust the police?

12. Do you like country music?

13. What is your fondest memory of me?

14. If you could change anything about yourself what would it be?

15. Would you date me?

16. What do you wear to sleep?

17. Have you ever peed in a pool?

18. Would you hide evidence for me if I asked you to?

19. If I only had one day to live, what would we do together?

20. What is your favorite thing about me?

21. Do you think I'm attractive?

22. What's your favorite color?

23. If you could bring back anyone that has passed, who would it be?

24. Tell me one interesting/odd fact about you?

25. Will you post this so I can fill it out for you?

Then repost it.

70 Things about me:

1.what are you initials?
BCH

2. What is your favorite thing to wear?:
boxers and a tshirt

3. What is the last thing you ate?
chocolate icing....what? Men can PMS too!

4. I say shotgun you say?
I'm driving!

6. Last person you hugged?
Nick

8. How many U.S states have you been to?
9

9. How many of the U.S states have you lived in:
1

11. Name something you like about yourself:
My feet...they're man pretty

13. Who is your best friend?:
Nick

14.Why are you still up?
Nick has a migraine....i suffer with him

15. Who/What made you angry today?
The dog for waking me up at 4 to go pee

16. Favorite type of Food?
mexican

17. Favorite holidays:
channukah and birthdays

18. Do you download music:
all the time

19. Do you care if your socks are dirty?
If I'm wearing them, yea...sleeping in them..not so much

21. Would you date the person who posted this?
Um....I don't know the person who posted this

22. Has anyone ever sang or played for you personally?
Yea....-sigh-

23. Do you love anyone?
-looks at left ring finger- HELLS NO

24. Do you like Bush?:
I'm gay...does that answer your question

25. Have you ever bungee jumped?:
Yea...fixed my back problem

26. Have you ever went white-water rafting:
yes...and almost DIED

27. Has anyone ten years older than you ever hit on you?
Yea...once or twice

28. How much money ya got?:
I got about 100 in my wallet and no idea how much in the bank

29. Have you met a real redneck?:
Franklin....that's my answer


30. How is the weather right now?:
70 degrees inside..thank you heater!

31.What are you listening to right now?:
Nick bitching

32. What is your current fav song?:
The Wanderer by Marc Broussard

33. What was the last movie you watched?:
Because I Said So

34. Do you wear contacts:
No...but I wear glasses when I read

35. Where was the last place you went besides your house?
Work

36. What are you afraid of?:
death, guns, really big fish

37. How many piercings and tattoo's have you had?:
No piercings...three tattoos...I want another though

38. How many pets do you have?
One...Voldemort

40. What do you usually order from Starbucks?
Nothing

42. Have you ever fired a gun:
a few times...scared the shit out of me

43. Are you missing someone:
Yea

44. Fav. TV show?:
Queer as Folk and the Simpsons

45. Do you have an iPod?:
Yea...love that thing!

46. Has anyone ever said you looked like a celeb?
James on QAF

48. Who would you like to see right now?:
my mom kinda

49. Favorite Celeberty you want to meet?:
-squee- ALANRICKMAN!

50. Do you find yourself loved?:
Duh

51. Have you ever been caught doing something you weren't supposed to?
I can't count the times on two hands

52. Favorite flower:
Lily

53. Butter, plain, or salted popcorn?
don't eat popcorn

54. What Magazines are you reading:
Cosmo and some hunting magazine that's in the bathroom with pretty men in it

55. Have you ever ridden in a limo?:
High school prom -supresses memory-

56. Has anyone you were really close to passed away recently?:
No

58. What's something that really bugs you?:
ignorance

60. Do you like Michael Jackson?:
The music, yea...the man...no

62. Favorite basketball team?
HA ha ha ha ha HAAAAAAA ha ha ha ha ha.....HA HA HA....whew!

63. Favorite cereal?:
Raisin Bran

64. Do you drive:
Yea

65. What's the longest time you've gone without sleep?
About 45 hours

66. Last time you went bowling?
Last month

67. Where is the weirdest place you have slept?:
On a plane over the atlantic

68. Who was your last phone call?:
Mom

69. Last time you were at work?:
Today

70. What's the closest orange object to you?
Keyboard

I stole it from about eight other people...

5 things you love - Voldemort (my dog), blank books, Coke, oranges and warm pajamas

4 people you love - Nick, Mom, Dad, Leslie

3 songs you love - Long Tall Sally_the Beatles, Somewhere Only we Know_Keane, Bad Moon Rising_CCR

2 sayings you love - "Yea, you do that!" "Are you sure?"

1 place you love - The Big Tree on my parent's farm

1. Is your second toe longer than your first?
Sadly, yes. But it's a sign that you'll be the dominant person in the household.

2. Do you have a favourite type of pen?
Papermate Profile 1.4 mm

3. Look at your planner for March 14, what are you doing?
Nothing. I don't even plan tomorrow.

4. What colour are your toenails usually?
Plain.

5. What was the last thing you highlighted?
Due Friday 2nd

6. What colour are your bedroom curtains?
Green

7. What colour are the seats in your car?
Grey leather.

8. Have you ever had a black and white cat?
No. Mom is allergic.

9. What is the last thing you put a stamp on?
Oh, god. Um, two summers ago on a postcard.

10. Do you know anyone who lives in Wyoming?
No.

11. Why did you withdraw cash from the ATM the last time?
To buy some lunch at a local place.

12. Who is the last baby that you held?
Marton's little girl.

13. Do you know of any twins with rhyming names?
Toni and Joni. Annoyting really.

14. Do you like Cinnamon toothpaste?
No. We have Crest Whitening.

15. What kind of car were you driving 2 years ago?
Dodge Ram 1500

16. Pick one: Miami Hurricanes or Florida Gators:
I hate orange. GO DAWGS!

17. Last time you went to Six Flags:
2006

18. Do you have any wallpaper in your house?
Yea.

19. Closest thing to you that is yellow:
Table skirt. That's right. TABLE SKIRT.

20. Last person to give you a business card?
Yesterday, a client.

21. Who is the last person you wrote a check to?
Marton

22. Closest framed picture to you?
Me and Blayson. It's one of those four picture things you get at the mall in a photo booth.

23. Last time you had someone cook for you?
Today

24. Have you ever applied for welfare?
No

25. How many emails do you have?
Too many.

26. Last time you received flowers?
Last night, virtual ones.

27. Do you think the sanctity of marriage is meant for only a man and a woman?
Haha! NO!

28. What kind of milk do you drink?
Kosher.

29. Do you play air guitar?
Yea, the husband hates it.

30. Do you take anything in your coffee?
Don’t drink coffee.

31. Do you have any Willow Tree figurines?
No, but Quinn wants them all.

32. Have you ever owned a Beanie Baby?
No.

33. Last person you spoke to from high school:
Marton!

34. Last time you used hand sanitizer:
Today at work.

35. Would you like to learn to play the drums?
Already know how to.

36. What color are the blinds in your living room?
Cream.

37. What is in your inbox at work?
Um, work stuff.

38. Last thing you read in the newspaper:
Don't read the paper.

39. What was the last pageant you attended?
I was in the Miss America contest. Geez, how gay do you think I am!

40. Where is the last place you bought pizza from?
Dominoes. God, peperonis are so good!

41. Have you ever worn a crown?
Oh, god, yes.

42. What is the last thing you stapled?
SWOT audit.

43. Did you ever drink Clear Pepsi?
Haha! OMG! I remember that shit!

44. Are you ticklish?
My knees are.

45. Last time you saw fireworks:
Haha. My neighbors did them on New Years.

46. Last time you had a Krispy Kreme doughnut:
OMG. WARM LIGHT! Last week.

47. Who is the last person that left you a message and you actually returned their call?
Blayson

48. Last time you parked under a carport:
Um, about two years ago?

49. Do you have a black dog?
Yea. Volemort!

50. Do you have any pickles in your fridge?
Yea. Two jars of them.

51. Are you an aunt or uncle?
Uncle. I have a neice and a nephew.

52. Who has the prettiest eyes that you know of?
Krystal. They're this odd gold green color.

53. Last time you saw a semi truck:
I live in the south. Stupid question.

54. Do you remember Ugly Kid Joe?
Sorta.

55. Do you have a little black dress?
No. I have a little black thong though.

Stolen from chavelaprincess

1) Ever been to a strip club?
No, but everyone wants me to go.

2) Ever been to a bar?
Yea, but it doubled as a music hall.

3) Ever been kicked out of a bar or a club?
No, but I have been kicked out of Wal-Mart.

4) Ever been so drunk you had to be carried out of somewhere?
No. But someone had to help me to the car one time when I was to tired to move.

5) Kissed someone of the same sex?
Um. Why NO. I don't belive I have......

6) Thrown up from drinking too much?
Nope. Eating too much, yes. But no drinking.

7) Had sex in a car?
Does a porno hug count?

8) Had sex at the beach?
Yup. Very uncomfortable.

9) Had sex in a movie theater?
Why?!?

10) Had sex in a bathroom?
Yup.

11) Had sex at work?
No. But I've seen people HAVING sex at work. Ewwwww.

12) Have you ever been in an "adult" store?
Yea. They're hilarious.

13) Bought something from an adult store?
Yea. Nice and curvy!

14) Have you spent over $100.00 in one visit to the adult store?
Yea. I know, I know. BAD Blayson!

15) Is there anyone on your friends list you would ever consider having sex with?
charmed310 because she's hot in a sparkly bikini! haha!

17) Have you been caught having sex?
YES! By PARENTS! ACK!

18) Are your breasts real?
What, my negative double a cup. Sure are!

19) Have you ever kissed a stranger?
Nope

20) Does anyone have naughty pics of you?
Yea. And you know who you are!

Stolen from charmed310

Comment, and I will:
1) Tell you why I friended you
2) Associate you with a song/movie
3) Tell a random fact about you
4) Tell a first memory about you
5) Associate you with an animal/fruit
6) Ask something I've always wanted to know about you
7) In retort, you MUST spread this disease in your LJ

1. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll
squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

2. Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken here? I'm
going to eat the next thing that comes outta its butt."

3. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

4. If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song
about him?

5. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

6. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but
don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

7. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get
undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

8. Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?
They're both dogs!

9. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme stuff,
why didn't he just buy dinner?

10. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

11. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

12. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from
morons?

13 Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have
the same tune?

14. Stop singing and read on..........

15. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

16. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets
mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the
window?

17. Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it
arrive faster?

18. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?


LIVE WELL...LAUGH OFTEN

[x] mother
[x] father
[ ] brother
[ ] sister
[x] nephew
[x] niece
[x] Cell phone.
[x] Own bathroom
[x] Own room.
[x] 2 story house
[x] Swimming pool
[x] hot tub
[x] Guest room.
[x] walk-in closet
[x] laptop or desktop in your room
[x] TV in your room
TOTAL: 14


[x] full or bigger bed
[ ] More than 10 pairs of shoes
[x] sunglasses/shades
[x]watch
[x] mp3 player/iPod
[x] ps2
[x] Xbox
[x] nintendo DS or PSP
[ ] Gameboy Advance
[ ] gamecube
TOTAL: 7


[x] basketball hoop
[ ] Air hockey table
[ ] Pool table
[ ] Ping pong table
[ ] foosball table
[ ] Trampoline
[x] Own a surfboard/wakeboard/snowboard/skateboard etc..*
TOTAL: 2


[x] Nightstand
[x] Stereo in bedroom.
[x] DVD player in room
[ ] Have something from abercrombie and fitch or hollister
[x] Gets $100+ each month
[x] Shops at AE
[ ]owns a gucci ,dooney & bourke, louis vuitton, coach, guess something
[ ] wears Lacoste
[ ] Parents give you credit card
TOTAL: 5


[x] job
[x] Goes shopping at least once a week
[ ] Expensive cologne/perfume
[x] AIM
[x] Camera
TOTAL: 4


[ ] electric/gas scooter
[x] Guitar/drums/Bass guitar
[x] piano/keyboard
[x] Any other instrument
[x] Hammock
[ ]Been on a cruise.
[x] traveled out of the state
[ ] Personal trainer
[x] expensive jewelry *blayson-->wedding rings!!! HEE
[x] Met a celebrity
TOTAL: 7


[ ] straightener/curling iron
[x] Been to a batting cage
[x]$100+ on you right now
[x] Credit card or atm card,debit card
[x] Been to Europe
[ ] Been to Hawaii
[x] Been to NYC.
[ ] Been to Chicago.
[ ] Been to LA
[x] Been to Florida.
[ ] Been to California
[ ] Been to the Bahamas
TOTAL: 6


[x] car
[x] pet
[ ] Ranch,cabin,beach house
[x] been to 5+states in the US
[ ] 250+ buddies on myspace
[ ] more than one house
TOTAL: 3


[x] home cooked meal almost every day
[ ] Been in a limo
[x] Been on a plane
[x] Own a camcorder
[x] Own a laptop
TOTAL: 4


*Total= 52 According to this, I'm upperclass. I don't really feel like it though.

11-21 - Ghetto
22-30 - average
31-40 - Spoiled
41+ - RICH/WAY UPPERCLASS

OOOH MY GAAAAH! Tomorrow you guys! Tomorrow I will be the equivalent to a MARRIED MAN! I feel like barfing. I sorta barfed already, but I feel like I can do it again! And I just ate...crap. Why am I so nervous!?!? It's just Nick. We've been together forever! All that's changing is the rings!

AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
I'm thinking it's not going to be a caffiene day for me....


Taken after a semi-sleepless night...

On a side note, Florida should be awesome. I've never been to the beach before.

A couple of idiot friends at a pre ceremony party.

My skinny ass.

This just goes to show, my friends and I rock.

"You're so loopy!" Nick to me

"Can't you just brush your teeh with your finger tonight?" Nick to Marton, who was staying over for the weekend

"I'm going to make her my love child." Marton to a little girl at a football game

"I'm pretty sober to be drunk." Nick after too many beers

"You're going to hell." Marton at the football game
"I think we're halfway there." Nick
"I think this IS hell!" Me, about the football game


"If you divide sixty by three...you get a number less than sixty." Leslie (yes, she said this)

"CRANK IT BIG BOY!" Leslie
"Don't ever say that again! EVER!" Nick

"One day, when I finally get you into some lederhosen." My dad to Nick

"I stand on the solid fact that some people are just plain dumbasses." Marton about his students

"Well, who would've thought I'd be wrong about that?" Nick after the toaster caught on fire

"Laughing massages your guts." Leslie

"It's all so dumbening." Sadly, me

"People are gonna think your - special." Me to Nick walking funny at the mall

"Random stuff pops outta my head when I'm not thinking." Me as an excuse for saying the next quote

"Did you go -POOF- (complete with hand motion)?" Me, to Leslie

"PERMISSION DENIED!" Nick after Leslie asked if she could see my wiener

"I haven't had white bread in six months! GIMME! GIMME! GIMME!" Nick after six months of me not letting him have white bread

"You're so sexy. It's amost as if you have...sexylexia." Nick to me

"I think I'm gonna barf. (pause)Oh yea, I'm gonna barf." Me after my first roller coaster

"I feel like I have a Blayson butt in these jeans." Leslie
"Um...why?" Me
"No butt. They just SLIDE right off." Leslie

"FOOD IS SO GOOD." Marton, cramming his face

"NABNASSETT!" Krystal

"It's the ruffer." Me
"Say what now?" Marton and Nick at the same time

"She was stupid." Leslie
"Oh man, you KNOW that's stupid!" Marton

"I have a favor to ask. Don't ask questions. Just take the blame." Marton
"Um, what for?" Me
"We naired Nick's legs." Leslie

"We're talking about the same person, we just don't know it." Nick

"DEER PARK.............WAAAAAAAATER!" Marton and Nick, complete with out of tune guitar

"Oh my gah! That girl is decked out in cammo! (bee flies in front of face) Oh shit!" Krystal

"Juan, the Promiscuous Puerto Rican." Krystal

"Where'd you get your information? Leslie.com." Some smartass ticket seller guy
"No. Leslie.org." Leslie, looking him straight in the face

"And what does this [ink blotch] look like?" Therapist
"Like someone spilt ink on paper." Krystal
"But, what does it REALLY look like?" Therapist

"This is dedicated to our one year old son, who's asleep behind the merch table. So keep it down." Lead singer of Roman Candle

"Just use the men's restroom. I'll watch you!" Me to Leslie at the Ryman

Okay, tell me what you think!

( Pictures so far. )